Story Write

Hey, this is shaggy,

Today I will be going over a few scenes from books which may never be published. These scenes are inspired by similar works of fiction, so don’t expect them to be totally original. Some people focus on their characters, and let them tell a story. I don’t have too many voices in my head, and most of them never quite turn into characters. Don’t get me wrong, I am fascinated by different people, personalities and attitudes but I prefer to observe and appreciate rather than to find my own. Someday they will come creeping in, but I am a visual person who prefers creating scenery and scenarios. Perhaps someone can come along by with characters to fit the scenes. Alrighty, here is the first one:

Weather Here (WET)

Good Marning, woof woof, *shakes water off*
Well, after my morning walk in the rain, I thought I would pass along some true-isms about Washingtonians. These have been around for a while, but they are still humourus.

You know you're from Washington/Oregon when:

Use the words "sun breaks" and know what it means.

Consider if it doesn't have snow on it or has not recently erupted, regardless of altitude, it is a "hill" not a mountain.

Only honk your car horn if a collision is imminent, NEVER for anything else.

Personally know someone from Alaska.

Consider swimming an indoor sport.

Think skiing always means being covered from head to toe, in snow or water.

In winter, go to work in the dark and go home in the dark, but only have an eight hour day.
You know all the important seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Raining and Road Construction.
You buy new sunglasses every year, because you cannot find your old ones.
You measure distance in hours.
You think people who use umbrellas must be tourists.
You get a bad sunburn on the first really nice day of summer.
You become frightened by the bright yellow orb in the sky until the 9-1-1 operator tells you it's just the sun...

A post of no significant meaning, other than to remember not to ever invite mathematicians into your house, or elephants for that matter

Several Mathematicians get together for a party. During the hors devours, they notice there is a large white elephant in the room gobbling all the peanuts. Not knowing what to do about it, they asked the only scientist who was willing to come to the party: Newton. Newton declared that through the laws of motion, the colder the elephant is, the slower he would continue to eat the peanuts (newton suggested they use alchemy to turn the elephant into gold, but the mathematicians pointed out this would do nothing to change the elephants intake speed). Therefore, they elected to put the elephant into the refrigerator. They divided into groups to decide the best way to fit the elephant into the refrigerator...

Mathematicians, and their silly rules

Yip Yip, good morning everyone!
Below is an excerpt from the scrolls of a famous mathematician of which I found lying around an old hobbit dwelling. Enjoy:

Most mathematicians are familiar with -- or have at least seen references in the literature to -- the equation 2 + 2 = 4. However, the less well known equation 2 + 2 = 5 also has a rich, complex history behind it. Like any other complex quantity, this history has a real part and an imaginary part; we shall deal exclusively with the latter here.

Many cultures, in their early mathematical development, discovered the equation 2 + 2 = 5. For example, consider the Bolb tribe, descended from the Incas of South America. The Bolbs counted by tying knots in ropes. They quickly realized that when a 2-knot rope is put together with another 2-knot rope, a 5-knot rope results.

grumble stumble snarf

Mondays are certainly dreary days. First my master woke up early, while I was still trying to sleep. He fumbled about for a bit in the kitchen, and even knocked over my water dish! It is cloudy and dull today, the weather finally cooled off however, which is nice for a sheepdog. :) However, once he went off to work, the house quieted down, and I was able to curl up on the floor next to the dresser and keep my other master company. We've been dozing for a while, just enjoying the relaxation. I think later today I may take myself for a walk and get the mail. Rather hard to turn the mail key with my nose though, I might have to take my master for a walk. :P In other news, the rabbits are still asleep (thank goodness they had a marathon Mao session the other night, that's what I get for posting the rules online), so I think I'll make myself some apple cider.

Mao

A ludicresly complicated card game for all you fanatics out there. :) Enjoy!
"Borrowed from Wikipedia, and modified for your viewing pleasure.

Rules of Mao

Part of the traditional experience of Mao is a new player being forced to learn some or all of the rules of the game through observation and trial and error. New players are not given a list of rules, they have to discover on their own.

Public rules

·        "The only rule I can tell you is this one"

·        “Goal is to eliminate all your cards”

·        “Plays like uno (place a card which matches either suit, or number)”

·        “Point of Order”

Rules of play

·        Each player is dealt an initial hand of the same number of cards, (7 cards).

·        Use 1 deck for every 2 players.

·        Place deck in middle of table, and flip the top card face up.

·        The dealer says: "this game of Mao has officially begun".

·        Players cannot touch their cards until the game begins.

·        Players can play any card which matches either the suit or value of top card.

·        If the player has no cards he can play, he must instead draw until he gets a playable card.

13

Good (woof) Morning on Friday the 13^th.

Here are some friendly words of advice:

Never open a black umbrella in the house. Black is the color of unlucky-ness. However, I have learned that opening a pink, orange, or tabby colored umbrella inside a dwelling to cause not bad luck to fall upon the owner. However, three days after the fact they surfaced covered with tiny scratches and sheets of strange colored fabric.

Yawning, although often considered cute by humans when pets yawn is also considered bad luck. In the olden days, when humans wore less suits and built things out of stone, there was a lot of fear by us dogs about silly things. Our life spans were shorter, and strange things could happen. An innocent yawn could bring about the devil, or in worst scenarios, lead to a deep peaceful slumber, and the humans may assume we died and bury us. We had to be very alert, and often found secret places to hide to take our naps. It was popular for those places to be up and out of the way, such as the roofs of thatched buildings.

Aaaarggg

Sometimes people are very hard to get along with. This is why I prefer the company of animals. People can be nosy, ornery, obstinate, and demand to have things their way (By the way, the people I am referring to aren't part of our group). It can be very tiring to work with them, to keep up a good front and to smile. But that is often our job. Grrrrr... Wish I had a good game of pinnochle with the rabbits to look forward to. I'd say more, but that may not be the best idea.

To end with, the weather is nice, I think I'll lay in the grass and chase butterflys the rest of the afternoon.


Grrwoof!

Looooong update

Whew! It's been rather hot this summer, too much running around and not enough lakes and streams to cool down! While my master has been slaving away, and "claiming" to be trying to catch up on sleep, I have been doing all those wonderful summery things that all dogs should be doing. I've read books, laying out on the grass, using my paws of course! Ever tried turning pages with your nose? Quite difficult, quite difficult indeed. In between my book spells, I have been walking myself around the park, and taking long naps in the sun. Highly recommended for all! Oh! The other day I ran through a cornfield, creating what humans call a crop circle. I do this to confuse them of course. :) Halloween is beginning to pop up in stores, and soon will be the first holiday of the new school year! Not counting labor day of course. I am rather excited about Halloween this year, as my master lives in an apartment complex, and we see/meet all the kids in costumes! The last two or three years we have had candy all ready and almost no visitors. :(

The Muse

An owl I met today on my afternoon walk to the river. He said his name was Muse. An interesting name for an owl, yet I inquired no further. I enjoyed the pleasant conversation we shared as he flew alongside me on my usual solitary sojourn. I asked him what his occupation was. He declared in a decidedly British accent, his voice soft and clipped, "I flutter over the shoulders of others, often adding to their work, and I give them something, a tangible object they put into their writing, or story. And in return, they give me perspective, a way if you will to look through the eyes of another."